The old man didn’t flinch when the Devil arrived

A few minutes before the services started, the towns people were sitting in their pews and talking. Suddenly, Satan appeared at the front of the church. Everyone started screaming and running for the front entrance, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate.

Soon everyone had exited the church except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew without moving, seeming oblivious to the fact that God’s ultimate enemy was in his presence. So Satan walked up to the old man and said, “Don’t you know who I am?”

The man replied, “Yep, sure do.”

“Aren’t you afraid of me?” Satan asked. “Nope, sure ain’t.” said the man.

“Don’t you realize I can kill you with a word?” asked Satan. “Don’t doubt it for a minute,” returned the old man, in an even tone. “Did you know that I could cause you profound, horrifying, physical AGONY for all eternity?” persisted Satan.

“Yep,” was the calm reply. “And you’re still not afraid?” asked Satan. “Nope.”

More than a little perturbed, Satan asked, “Well, why aren’t you afraid of me?”

The man calmly replied, “Been married to your sister for over 48 years.”

Related Posts

My Husband Offered to Stay Home with the Baby While I Went Back to Work – Everything Seemed Perfect Until His Mom Called Me

When my husband offered to stay home with our baby so I could return to work, I thought I’d hit the jackpot. Clean house, happy baby, homemade…

Passenger disrupts 8-hour flight — Captain shuts her down after landing

Logan, a 27-year old six-two inches tall professional swimmer, was returning from a freestyle swimming competition. The flight from London to New York was about to last…

Girl Sells $2K Prom Dress to Pay for Pal’s Mom’s Treatment, 17 Years Later Learns She’s a Millionaire — Story of the Day

I grew up in a house where “luxury” was a word we only saw in magazines. My mother, Lisa, worked back-breaking hours as a bank teller, her…

How Many Dogs Can You Really See? A Fun Test for Sharp Eyes

At first glance, this picture looks like a cheerful lineup of St. Bernards, maybe eight or nine at most. Most people stop there, certain they’ve spotted them…

The Day Bikers Saved My Life Instead of Destroying It

I walked away from the cemetery with a piece of my soul missing. I was still wearing the black suit, my hands trembling as I clutched the…

Why the Bathtub Is the Safest Place to Store Your Luggage in a Hotel

Checking into a hotel usually feels like a luxury—you toss your bags on the bed, check the view, and relax. But travel experts and pest-control insiders are…