The curve of her brow, the way her fingers curled slightly against my shirt, the tiny freckle near her temple. All the things I might have missed if I’d kept trying to prove myself to people who never really cared.
“I don’t think so,” I said. “But…
I’ve been asking myself that too.”
“Why did it matter so much, Reid?” she lifted her head a little. “Getting that moment with them?”
I sighed, not ready to say it out loud but knowing I had to. Elodie deserved that and more.
“Because, my love, for a long time, I thought keeping peace with Nadine’s family was the same thing as being a good person.
Like if I could just stay useful enough, polite enough… helpful enough… they wouldn’t rewrite the story of me.”
She didn’t interrupt.
She just waited, her hand on my arm.
“I know that sounds stupid. But even after the divorce, I kept showing up. Fixing things.
Taking containers of food whenever anyone was sick. Laughing at jokes that made me uncomfortable. And then I brought you into it, thinking maybe they’d see us together and understand that I wasn’t trying to cause problems.
That I still had goodwill.”
“You thought you were doing the noble thing,” Elodie’s voice was soft.
“Yes, but it wasn’t. Not really. It was exhausting, El.
It was like trying to patch a ship that had already sunk.”
Her expression flickered. She sat up fully now, one leg tucked under her.
“I never wanted to be a test,” she said.
“You weren’t,” I said immediately. “You were the proof.
Of what peace really looks like. Of what it feels like when someone just… sees you.
And stands next to you anyway.”
Tears burned the edges of my eyes and I let them. Because I wasn’t embarrassed in front of her.
Not anymore.
“I didn’t plan this dinner to be cruel,” I said. “I did it because I needed to stop performing for people who think kindness is something you earn with ridiculous chores.
I needed to show you that I wouldn’t let them humiliate you and pretend it was a joke.”
She leaned forward, resting her forehead against mine.
“I know,” she whispered. “And I didn’t say it earlier because I was mad at you. But I’m proud of you. That took guts.”
“I just wish it hadn’t taken me so long to stop trying to belong where I never did.”
There was a long pause but it didn’t feel empty.
The silence was serene. It felt like the last page of a book I’d been trying not to finish.
“I don’t want our life to look like that,” I said finally. “I don’t want to build something with you based on fear or appeasement.
I want a life where we both feel safe. And heard. And…
wanted.”
“Then,” Elodie smiled. “Reid, let’s build that kind of life.”
I nodded, holding her close.
And that was the first night I finally stopped second-guessing where I stood, not just with her but with myself.
Not bad people. Not revenge-filled people.
Just…
free.
